Day 12 Mistakes

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear making mistakes

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into black and white thinking if i make a mistake

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget to work with playfulness

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear older white men being verbally aggressive with me about my work

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to identify myself with mistakes and past failures

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to beat myself up when i start making mistakes

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear toxic emotions in other men at work “toward” me

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not work on the words people have called me..So that the words do not affect me anymore. But eventually help me.

i forgive myself for accepting ad allowing myself to judge myself as being bad if i make a mistake. As if I’m hurting other people by making mistakes by pissing them off.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be afraid to piss off people. When in reality i am not trying to piss them off.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see that if i piss someone off. To play with that. Rather than becoming serious and miserable. Therefore I commit myself to if i piss someone off to have fun or play with it. To play with the words for example. After all comedy is based on pissed off people not getting there way. I’ve had it done to me repetitively…If I’m pissed off people keep poking at it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go to the point of madness when judging myself after making mistakes

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hate older white men because of some memories I’ve had of them being verbally aggressive or abusive with me. And I reacting by taking myself seriously. Rather than a play.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hold my incompleteness of trade college againt myself

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think just because i failed a class I can’t still try to pass state board exam

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to tell myself im a failure because i didn’t pass practice test to take state board exam.

Therefore i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that if i’m pissed off and others poke at me I should do it to them

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to tease people and bring humor or use humor as a healing way for conflict of pissed off people. To not take ourselves so seriously

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to when people get pissed off to begin taking myself so seriously. rather than playful. I lose my playfulness so to speak.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not make best of whats here.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not see mistakes as a learning Process.Not an event. or and end result.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that mistakes are a part of being human.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself if i make a mistake in a structured social setting such as work or martial arts class to belittle myself with judgment and get angry at myself.

When and as i see myself or judge myself making a mistake i stop and breathe.

When and as i see myself thinking about mistakes I did in past. I realize i can’t change the best but make the best of whats here.

When and as i find myself going into memories of older male white men getting verbally aggressive with me or physically with there facial expression, eye expression, and tone of voice.

When and as i see myself going into anger about older white men that i assume are dicks i stop and breathe.

When I go into black and white thinking after making a mistake I stop and breathe.

When and as i see myself going into memories of older white men spewing verbal venom at me I stop and breathe. Or in the present tense. For breathe is the power that will take me away from doing something that i regret.Rather that lashing out if an arrow penetrates my heart.

When and as i go into critical thinking about my mortuary college practice test.I stop and breathe.

I commit myself to see mistakes as opportunity.

I commit myself to see the “play” in the characters

I commit myself to turn seriousness into a joke. and mistakes into learning opportunities.

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